The 3 Liters of pure fun. Just kidding.

Wine Cube Merlot 2010
California M rs. Dan bought this wine at a good price. $15 for a three liter box of Merlot. I’m not proud of her. We survived this wine for more than a week. It lasted so long because it isn’t a very good wine. I actually like boxed wine because it’s cheap and lasts forever. I wish this one had turned tits up so I could have tossed it early and moved on to something else. The cheap bastard in me keeps me from pouring out wine that hasn’t got mold growing on the surface or turned sour.

It is a passable wine in the minimal sense. She bought it at Target and was excited that she got such a good deal. She even accepts her mistake. Not that it really sucks like some of the Lost Vineyards of the World wines or Liberty Creek. I actually might have given this one 2 corks if it was in a 750ml bottle because I could have finished it off fairly quickly. But I just couldn’t look forward to having a glass of wine at the end of the day knowing this cube of red glop was sitting there on the countertop.

I guess the best way to describe this wine is boring. It’s flavor was weak despite having a full mouthfeel. If I was a Martian visiting earth for the first time and had this as my taste of human culture I think I would pull out my laser beam and blast everyone in sight for being an insult to the universe.

[quote] If I was a Martian visiting earth for the first time and had this as my taste of human culture I think I would pull out my laser beam and blast everyone in sight for being an insult to the universe. [/quote]

Now is when I usually head to the internet to see what’s out there about the wine I’m reviewing. I’m not bothering.

When you go to Target buy the better wines they carry (Middle Sister, Little Penguin or even Barefoot) just skip the Cube of Merlot. Or head to a real wine shop like Vineyard, Ninth Street or Wine World.

Cost: $15
Size: 3L

Score: 1 Cork
Dan’s Rating System:

1 Cork: Use the cube to prop up a pumpkin when you go to the range for target practice. Oops, I missed the pumpkin and hit the cube. Purple crap everywhere.
2 Corks: Serve it after your guests chow down on Three Mile Island chicken wings and their taste buds are warped.
3 Corks: Sit back and watch America’s Got Talent while people make a fool of themselves for a million bucks.

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